Relationship difficulties
“We are biologically, cognitively, physically, and spiritually wired to love, to be loved, and to belong. When those needs are not met, we don’t function as we were meant to. We break. We fall apart. We numb. We ache. We hurt others. We get sick. ”
Relationships and connecting to others is a fundamental part of the human experience. In the words of Aristotle, “Man is by nature a social animal”.
There are various types of interpersonal relationships: friendship, romantic, family, and professional. Whilst all interpersonal relationships have different amounts of interaction, feelings, and goals, the degree to which a person feels connected to another has a significant impact on their wellbeing, both body and mind.
Feeling connected to others is a feeling of belonging and closeness. People who feel more connected to others have lower levels of anxiety and depression, and have higher levels of self-esteem, empathy, and trust. Conversely, feeling disconnected from other people can lead to feelings of loneliness, social isolation, and overall dissatisfaction in life.
Whilst connection is a core psychological need, many people struggle with it. Developing a genuine connection can create large amounts of fear for people because an essential ingredient needed to connect with another is vulnerability. Being vulnerable means that we are exposing parts of our inner world (thoughts, feelings, beliefs) that may be quite confronting.
Amongst all the interpersonal relationships, difficulties in romantic relationships is most commonly explored in therapy. People in romantic relationships often spend significant amounts of time with each other and on a more intimate level. This often opens up space for more vulnerability unlike other relationships. Conflict is a natural part of all relationships. However, if it is not managed in a healthy way, it can have damaging consequences for each person and the overall relationship. The renowned psychologist and researcher on marital stability, Gottman, states that the way in which couples interact and communicate with each other can determine whether a relationship continues or ends.
Psychological therapy can help those in all types or stages of relationships, such as individuals who have recently experienced a break-up, are unhappily single, disappointed by friends, difficulties with family, or unhappy with a working or professional relationship.
Learning the art of effective communication is an important skill to have in building a healthy and satisfying relationship of all kinds. Treatment for relationship difficulties typically includes developing a greater understanding about a person’s fundamental needs, learning healthy communication strategies, and building healthy boundaries.